Thursday, June 05, 2008

And now, for the important news...


Here's the skinny (elevated "commas" mine):

NEW YORK, NY -- When the "Sex and The City" "movie" made its New York City premiere last week, "Sarah" "Jessica" "Parker" "stunned" fans in a floor length Nina Ricci strapless number.

The elegant gown, with a gold sash, was full of crinkly silver metallics that draped to the floor, and it was a "one-of-a-kind" gown Parker's on-screen "character" Carrie Bradshaw would have approved of, except for one little thing - the dress had already been worn "several" times.

Parker "told" the "New" "York" "Times" she was disappointed to learn that "her" Nina Ricci gown had previously been worn by Lauren Santo Domingo to the Metropolitan Museum of Art's Costume Institute Gala on May 5. And before that, the gown was worn by "Lindsay" "Lohan" in Harper's Bazaar magazine this past March.

Nina Ricci's camp offered no comment on the dress "debacle," but "Parker" made her feelings known in the "paper."

Pobrecita

la chica stunned me strapless
oh so rica, mi pobrecita
crinkly silver
one of a kind
already been worn several time

los chicharones con papas
I am so disappointed to learn
Nina Ricci con dulce
is my only way
Lauren Santo Domingo
& Lindsay too
Ai!, Cabron!

Ricci’s camp offered none,
but Parker made hers known:

"My affection for the dress hasn't changed," Parker told the newspaper. "But what they did was so short-sighted. It's just unethical and disappointing that they would allow the dress to be worn again."

Again!

Ai! The world! Come to, what has it?!

Dresses worn!

Again!

Crinkly silver!

Que lastima, Sex in My City,
I am so sorry, I pray for you,
for your injury,
for your toiletries,
for your whatnots,
I feel it,
the unethical &
short-sighted pain.
I ruminate for you:
were I a Baptist,
I would proselytize
for you, this
pain and sin of
the silver crinkly!

“I tried on the dress under the eye of Olivier,” sez Sex in My City.

Olivier! Thieving captor on the red!

My carpet so embarrassed!

“It is now clear that Olivier is blind, pobrecita,” I sing to her, the Sex of My City. “And a jewel thief.”

“I said nothing of jewels,” sez the Sex of My City.

“That dress wasn’t schekels, chica,” I reply, still singing to the Sex of My City.

Sex of My City esta muy forlorn.

“Is celebrity, Lauren?” I sing. Sex in My City turns from me as I ply this dream of excuse.

“Red carpets do not know her,” implies Puig. “It depends on how.”

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8 Comments:

Blogger Lee said...

Interesting bits of news and poetry, Paschal. This was one of those poems I didn't completely understand but I got the feeling that you might have been laughing at the chica. When I read the news, especially combined with your phrasings, it became a case of expletives deleted. I kept wondering how many people in starving countries could have been fed for the cost of that dress and she was whining because it wasn't the status symbol she had desired. Sheesh!

My next question, asked in all sincerity from a drama lover, is, "Do I really want to see this movie?"

Peace my friend!

11:07 AM  
Blogger murat11 said...

Good morning, Lee.

Disgusted is more like it. Laughing would be more generous than I felt.

Movies to See Before Ever Reaching for SATC (in no particular order):

1. Michael Clayton
2. Charlie Wilson's War
3. Knightley's Pride and Prejudice
4. Thompson's Sense and Sensibility
5. Hear My Song
6. The Secret of Roan Inish
7. Chinatown
8. Local Hero
9. The Secret Life of Words
10. Ocean's 11 or 12
11. There Will Be Blood
12. In the Name of the Father
13. Into the West
14. Cinema Paradiso
15. Mediterraneo

Given enough time, we should be able to build a movie queue that would render SATC unnecessary.

Happy viewing!!

11:35 AM  
Blogger rebecca said...

Oh, probecita la lovely diva!

oh, come on parker, get a life. unethical?!!!! yikes! i don't know paschal, these stars live in a parallel universe of which i could never relate. what the hell? she looked good in the dress, it was beautiful, she looked beautiful, it was probably given to her or loaned to her....whatcha bitchin' about SJP? get over it...there's some serious shit going on in the world and this is your gripe? sorry, gal, you lost me there.

as usual, paschal, i always need to reread your stuff...you are so complex, as i sign off and sing....if i only had a brain.... :)

10:11 PM  
Blogger murat11 said...

Rebecca: I like the song you're singing. Harry Connick, Jr did a cool version of it on his second album.

Pobrecita diva just caught me at the wrong time. I think part of my reaction was a result of seeing la diva at Charlie Rose's round table on PBS a few nights back. As I passed through the room, I thought, what could possibly be the value of pretending that SATC has any relevance to your show?

Talk about your Emperor's (Empress's) New (Used?) Clothes.

But, I have a new Sunday Scribble to do, and thankfully it is not about fashion...

Best to you.

7:36 AM  
Blogger San said...

OMG, I am SO glad you alerted me to this. I was looking at the VERY SAME IDENTICAL dress. I was going to wear it to my father-in-law's birthday party this weekend. How disrespectful that would have been. A Nina Ricci that's been around. And around. WHAT EVER WILL I WEAR TO THAT COOKOUT NOW????

I liked the way you gathered the images and the emotions and crinkled them together all sparkly.

5:29 PM  
Blogger murat11 said...

Ms San, as you know, I like to do my albeit smart part in raising the consciousness bar on the burning issues of social justice before us today. This was clearly one issue not to be missed. I'm glad you feel the same way, and I'm also glad to have saved you from having spent your schekels on a thrice worn cookout number, not to mention saving you from Olivier's being glued to your right forearm: it's hell when you want to gnaw on some sloppy pork ribs. Still, that would have been one hell of a dress to wipe your saucy hands on.

5:41 PM  
Blogger alister said...

Looks like everyone left. But now that I’m here, is there any bubbly crinkly left? Any tongue-in-cheek or pitiful whatnots or papas con dulce??? I see stains on the red carpet. Must’ve been a good party! I know I've enjoyed the heck out of the aftermath :-D

11:19 AM  
Blogger murat11 said...

It's all a party, Miss A. I'm wondering who should get the dress next. Things to ponder.

5:40 PM  

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