Thursday, May 15, 2008

Sunday Scribbling #111: Soar/Sore/(Psoas)

The Mighty Psoas of East L.A.

From lumbar to the
Pacific Rim’s
subarticulate articulator, mummified
flexor, intraterrestrial prankster:
are you medial or lateral, only
Ida knows for sure,
interrogator of the rectus
abdominus flux.
How ya been, she sez,
and all hell breaks loose: try
putting your finger in
the anterior superior iliac spine
& see if you don’t go all
postal in the territories.
The answer is, “it depends,”
& by that I mean
the femur is variable,
depending on your position.
Don’t ask you dog or cat
(or ferret) to do this, Dr. Ida
will contradict Bogduk any day,
& that’s the very day you’ll
wish you’d never seen
the advert in toddler profile
because you sure as dickensfire won’t
want to see yourself as the
evil sister of the very same thing,
awash in deregulated tissue
issuance, all floundered
beyond the ability to face
the reality of toady praise. My
anatomy trains are
neither local nor express, they’re
derailed and fossilized
beyond the west Texas fury
of distal adjustment, we’re not talking
12th century thoracic, we’re talking 21st
century pectineus base. Flouted, she
recoils, and the damage is done,
you’re in the manual, &
Feldenkrais himself will fusiform
you back to the beginning.
If your large bursa can
communicate with the cavity of
a hip joint, so much the better: I’ll
settle for fibrocartilage in 5
slipcovers, a sympathetic trunk
beats hell out of Beef Wellington,
your only option is Natasha Rizopoulos
& she’s only step by step,
light years beyond
the contents of the dark.

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Blogger Granny Smith said...

Oh, wonderful! Such lovely existent and nonexistent words that convey a sort of half-sense. This has a lot of craft in it.

9:28 PM  
Blogger murat11 said...

Thanks again for your good words, Granny Smith. Did a little digging to reacquaint myself with the psoas: my "favorite" heading in Wikipedia was "Significance in Western Cuisine." That was a frightening thought until I read that the psoas roughly approximates the tenderloin (scandalous enough to a vegetarian) of a cow.

10:20 PM  
Blogger texasblu said...

lol - I'm so glad to see Granny smith say some of these words are nonexistent - I was feeling quite dumb! Murat11 - this is so unique, it's awesome, for lack of a better word. Really good work. :)

11:38 PM  
Blogger Leonard Blumfeld said...

Hilarious. Loved it.

1:25 AM  
Blogger murat11 said...

Thank you, TexasB and LB.

5:31 AM  
Blogger San said...

Oh my aching medial meniscus! You've done gone and dislocated my sense of time and place. Call a chiropractor. My sacroiliac has gone off my rocker. I need an adjustment. I need a Merck manual.

My little girl graduates from college tomorrow and my femur is most variable, as is my mood. Call a Pilates professional. I need my core strengthened.

4:02 PM  
Blogger San said...

And what really worries me is this poem of yours makes perfect sense to me. Love it!

4:04 PM  
Blogger murat11 said...

Well, girlfriend, seems you need a lotta things. Nothin' an old-fashioned and feet propped up on the deck can't fix. Spike Jones on dee box. Up on Cripple Creek, she sends me...

Welcome back to Blog-Mart.

4:55 PM  
Blogger gautami tripathy said...

My mind is whirling away from me!

Love it!

ah, the anticipation

7:40 AM  
Blogger murat11 said...

Thank you, Gautami. Nothing wrong with mental dervishness. Peace.

8:43 AM  
Blogger soliluna said...

While reading my mind felt like the spoon reaching into a jar full of caramel-and boy do I love caramel!
Great stuff here~

11:03 AM  
Blogger murat11 said...

Spoon on, soliluna, spoon on. Thanks for stopping by.

11:28 AM  
Blogger Crafty Green Poet said...

excellent, very clever, very entertaining and well worth reading again!

12:43 PM  
Blogger murat11 said...

Fly on over any time, crafty green one.

1:26 PM  
Blogger Tammie Lee said...

comic play on med talk! Is that why most folks do not understand their docs?
My teacher (cranial sacral) use to say that criticism by loved ones are stored in the psoas. No wonder they can be sooooo ouchy!

5:28 PM  
Blogger murat11 said...

Tammie Lee: I think it was my rolfing sessions in New Orleans that first introduced me to the psoas. Speaking of cranial sacral, my rolfer always ended the "rolf-pain" with some cranial sacral: heavenly ice cream. The day of the psoas, I believe I got three scoops. That little hideaway muscle's the perfect place to tuck away those ouchies. Of course, it makes them elusive to dredge up as well. In my surfing to prep for the poem, I saw the psoas referred to as the "Hidden Prankster."

6:38 PM  
Blogger San said...

Jeez, I gotta google "psoas." Or do I dare? Will it just give me another way to visualize pain?

9:49 PM  
Blogger murat11 said...

Chica, you ain't lived till you have your psoas...well, um...awakened. Forget that kundalini stuff: the hidden prankster is where it's at.

9:59 PM  
Blogger Tammie Lee said...

The hidden prankster seems to describe it as well! I like the idea of cranial as ice cream, it can be quite heavenly! Rolfing is amazing as well. Though I have never gone through a proper series.
I look forward to your future posts and your past ones too.

1:24 PM  
Blogger alister said...

Well this is just too good, too unique to believe, this, my good fortune stumbling upon your scat-writing I’ll call it, amidst the other Sunday Scribblings fare, finding you the JD Walter of Writing… Who would have guessed? :-D

12:43 AM  
Blogger murat11 said...

missalister: "Scat-writing." I'll take it, in both its possibilities, and start callin' meself Miss Ella. Great to have you drop in. I made a quick dash to The Essence of a Thing: your house is gonna need much more than a quick visit: I'll be back: your profile is intriguing enuff, and the house is definitely a-rockin'.

5:55 AM  
Blogger San said...

hahaha. i didnt understand a lot. but it was a fun read.

9:33 AM  
Blogger murat11 said...

sanjana: i didn't understand a lot either. but it was a fun write.

10:35 AM  

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